The List: 5 times Vetements convinced us to break the bank

First, they laugh. Then they copy or take out a loan to join the cult.

If you claim to have loved VETEMENTS from day one, let’s get real here. We all remember the hot minute Demna Gvasalia had us all scratching our heads a little. When Demma set out to produce an “uncool” collection of clothes that didn’t succumb to trends, seasons, gender or new and innovative cuts and proclaimed a desire to go against the grain of luxury, we thought how cool. But what we got were sweatshirts with never ending sleeves that cost a kidney and DHL t-shirts that were selling like hot cakes for $399. No, not some hot new fashion acronym that you were not aware of but as you first thought, the delivery company.

So for a little while there we laughed and thought you ain’t getting my hard earned money for a jumper that could leave me tripping at my own heels and one which gives Kanye West’s Yeezy collection a run for its money. I mean come on… why turn your back on luxury but still pay the price?

But as the story goes, before we knew it, we were all hooked. We’re talking daily stalks and contemplating how many favourite t-shirts we would need to sell on eBay to own a slice of the action. Gvasalia knew what he was doing all along. The man spent time at Margiela for fashion’s sake! So upon contemplating our own purchase we thought it was only natural to share the top 5 times VETEMENTS made a strong case for why we should break the bank… or rob it!

VETEMENTS re-worked high-rise slim-leg jeans. 

The Fall16 collection boasts slogan tee’s which scream “you fuck’n asshole” and the sentiment rings true when looking to make a purchase from the coveted range. $1456 for jeans, I mean come on! But then again there are plenty of very real reasons to invest in a pair. The cult ‘reworked’ jeans are pieced together from panels of tonal denim to create that sought after, deconstructed look. The kind of jeans that say “I’m not even trying” but really you’re still paying off your credit card to wear them during Fashion Week. *** Disclaimer, by Fashion Week we mean sitting at home on the couch live streaming your favourite shows – yes it’s normal to sit at home dressed up to watch Fashion Week – only a trendsetter would understand.

It’s a no brainer really! Girls love them, your grandma won’t understand them and they will live a lifetime in your wardrobe. They have long reached a cult status so you won’t be relinquishing them to the back of your wardrobe anytime soon. Where do we sign the papers for a credit card increase?

VETEMENTS cotton blend embroidered sweatpants 

Sweatpants once used to say “given up” but thanks to VETEMENTS they now say “batshit crazy”. I mean $745 for sweatpants why?! Well… let us tell you why. Because you can wear them everywhere, apart from the gym that is, because heck VETEMENTS ain’t for sweating in.

Pair them with a tee and coat for all your “grocery runs” when you want to pretend that you don’t care,  but really you know an ex could be lurking around any corner. Show him that you have moved on and up in life, I mean come on you’re wearing VETEMENTS after all! They will also take all your lunch date t-shirts from 0 to hero and when you can finally afford that holiday, they will give your airport style A game. Selena Gomez and Bella Hadid who? I mean they cost enough for someone to run after you for a sneaky snap.

***Can’t link out for you to purchase this item because as the VETEMENTS story goes …SOLD OUT!

If you’re an 80’s baby then chances are you still own a little TITANIC memorabilia buried somewhere very deep in your closet. You would throw it out but the pain is still too raw… Rose how could you, there was plenty of room left on the board. So naturally when the VETEMENTS Titanic jumper came out you had to have it. $1200 for a hoodie, that’s nothing when you can wear it as a jumper or dress to your next lunch date or fashion event. The only thing that stopped you was Leo winning an Oscar and the jumper selling out within hours. Who was laughing then…Gvasalia that’s who.

VETEMENTS Layered Printed Mini Dress 

$2678 for a layered hoodie…“What do you mean…” Maybe you became a Belieber in 2016 or maybe you are just imagining all the styling options. I mean come on, a hoodie and dress in one? It practically pays for itself. Sure it costs the same as a solid GUCCI bag, but can you live in a GUCCI bag all year round? No, we didn’t think so.

Just imagine this piece with Stuart Weitzman over the knee boots in 2020 – when you finish paying this purchase off. We live for the day this thorned beauty is hanging in our wardrobe and taking our street style game from ‘finding our feet’ to being chased down by photographers. You know you want to live that dream too!

VETEMENTS sock boots 

Sure the VETEMENTS sock boots will set you back a cool $1680 but look on the bright side, you don’t need to buy socks and those things can get pricey. If that’s not enough to convince you or your other half who thinks you are crazy, there is always the “I don’t smoke” excuse.

Just think about it. The average packet of cigarettes is $30 and the average chain smoker will go through a packet a day. That’s $210 a week, $840 a month. You would really be doing your bank account and health a service by investing in shoes stuck to lighters instead of smoking through a cool 10k a year. Priorities…

If you’re a little sad after this post because your wardrobe is lacking some VETEMENTS love, don’t be. We will always have the option of socks that cost more than our undies. Give your feet some love here.